Wednesday, April 20, 2011

51 more to go...

One week ago today my husband left for his first deployment. It took him all week to get to his final destination and now that he is there its more of a reality to me.

We had our ups and downs this week. The worst being that my kids questioned if he was going to die. Of course I said no and comforted them the best I could. But then it made me think the same. Thats the hardest part of being an Army wife... Being strong when you dont think you have the strength to.

So here we are beginning week two. Wish me luck! Pray for my husbands safety whie youre at it.
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Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Two down!

Today was an okay day. I started my day off at the doctors for a routine check up.. only for him to tell me I need to loose weight! For those of you who don't know me, I've been a big girl my entire life! Now I'm just a bit too big and I have to do something about it. Any who, the doctor asked me why I had stopped in the weight program I was in a few months ago and I mentioned my husband being deployed now and training back then and lost it. LOL He tossed me a gown and told me he'd be right back. We went through the fun procedure, we are good to go. He came back in and told me he didn't want to upset me. I stopped him right there, and told him I wasn't upset about the weight topic, my husband literately just left and it was the first time I had said that out loud. He then replied with, "well we can't cry in here today I lost my wife two weeks ago and I can't cry at work" Whew and I thought my last few weeks had went bad. So long story short, the morning was rough.

The afternoon, it was good. I baked in the sun and relaxed with my good friend while our kids played at the beach. Now I'm burnt, it's a side affect. Better than being drunk or high LOL. That came from no where sorry. Main points here, was that today was good. Talked to hubby he is safe and still in route, talked to momma she is 100% supportive with my weight issues, talked with my good friend which always makes things good! Very blessed with the people I have in my life!

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Day One

It took forever to see my husband off. Six hours to be exact... I cried a bit and after all the buses left I stopped. Its so weird to be emotionally exhausted and be so uoset then be numbed by it all. So here we are at the park letting the kids run off all their bottled up energy from earlier.

Sigh.. Lets just hope things run smoothly this next year and we gain from this experience.
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Monday, April 11, 2011

T-E-A-M... I??

Right now he is upstairs packing, and not for a vacation, but for a long year away from his family serving his country. We've had our ups and downs with his chain of command with this whole deployment and quiet frankly I'm not as ready as I thought. A little background for those who dont know.


We moved to Hawaii this past June knowing he'd be deploying sometime this April. A full year, almost, having time to prepare. Then March got here, his company had too many soldiers going, and he was put on rear-d. Which means if something were to happen to someone over there or a spot became available he'd go at anytime with no times notice. Being on rear-d he would have been stuck on endless redundant details. So we go through a few weeks of thinking he wasn't being deployed only to wake up one day to his battle buddies saying,"hey dude when you coming back with us" He was now deploying and no one from his chain of command had communicated this with him. Oh well, we got over that and here we are.


So, here I am, sitting downstairs listening to his things being tossed on the floor, the scuffling of  his feet and bags as the prepare to leave the house, and I think to myself "whew maybe I'm not ready". Every time I look at him I tear up. Bryan is my best friend, my soul mate, my other half. He isn't like the typical husband that doesn't do much except game and complain about work. My husband and I are a team, a great one for that matter... and I'm not so sure if I can do this team work with out him. There isn't an "I" in team..

Saturday, April 2, 2011

I need a cigerette and I dont even smoke

That title says it all. Im stressed to the max... FOR NO REASON. My husband is still here, my bills are paid, we have groceries.. Oh wait we also have 2 very high strung kids. I need Nanny 911 to come to my house and teach us how to live better. Im totally lost. Ugh suggestions, tips, a week away... Anything to lower my blood pressure.
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